Perfect
by pretty-good-liar
Summary: some monochrome/checkmating angst/fluff romance idk. genderfluid!blake, blake struggles coming to terms with their gender identity, weiss is surprisingly understanding. triggers for panic attacks/anxiety


"So? Are you going to _answer _me, or are you going to stand there like a statue?"

Blake crossed her arms, glared somewhere to the side of Weiss's feet. "I told you," she said, speaking only because Weiss was obviously not going to let her get any sleep if she refused to participate in this very one-sided conversation. "If something big comes up, I will come to my team first. Why can't you trust me on that?"

She held her arms against her chest as if protecting it from something, discomfort contorting her normally stoic expression into a near grimace.

Well good. If she was going to be vague, she deserved the discomfort.

"Oh, perhaps because it only took you three days since the last disappearance to wander off _again_."

"I didn't _wander off_," the feline snapped, her arms tightening around her chest, her voice ripping through her throat, which was way too tight, way too dry.

"Then where were you?"

"I'm allowed to go places without telling you."

"And I'm allowed to ask about them."

"That doesn't _mean _I have to _answer_." Blake's nerves were frayed dangerously thin, and her head was racing, and she - her skin itched and she - _she she she fucking stop it -_

"Blake!" Weiss's voice spiked, a flicker of concern sparking in her icy eyes as she watched her friend fall to her knees, clutching at her head and shaking.

"I just _really _don't want to be around anybody at the moment," she - _he _- said, one arm clutching around his stomach, the other rubbing at his temple.

"What on earth is the matter with you?" and Blake wasn't sure if that was empathy or concern or anger couldn't focus on anything except the need to find a binder and a wig and _fuck _why wouldn't Weiss _leave_?

"Please just - don't look at me." God that voice was so high that wasn't _right-_

"Blake you aren't making any sense," the heiress clipped, sinking to her knees by the feline's side, her brow furrowed with worry and concern and - god he had to say something his heart felt like a ticking time bomb-

"I'm just - going through something right now - and…after the whole White Fang disaster, I didn't think this'd be the best time to…"

His voice faded, and he couldn't keep eye contact with Weiss; why did this have to be a thing he'd just learned about _now_? Timing _sucked_.

And he - he didn't know how to deal with it, he just knew he felt uncomfortable in this skin and wanted his hair off his shoulders and off the back of his neck and his ears burned and everything was just too overwhelming to be dealing with.

"Blake," Weiss's dry tone of cutting logic severed through all the panic and racing thoughts. "You admitted you were a _terrorist_ three days ago. Whatever this is can't _possibly _be worse."

He glanced up meekly, claws scratching at the back of his neck, tearing at the skin until he saw the flicker of a smile on Weiss's lips.

He returned it, meekly, curled his knees to his chest, realizing that the two of them would look absolutely ridiculous if Yang or Ruby burst in on them just huddled in the middle of the floor.

The thought strengthened his smile. "I-I…didn't think it was important to you. I didn't want to bother you with some new problem to deal with that doesn't…doesn't matter to you."

The look in Weiss's eye told him just how stupid he sounded; he'd had an argument, or he'd thought he did…something about it not being their problem, that they had enough on their plate, that Weiss at least 'didn't care', as she'd said, would probably just ignore him from now on - that this was a problem he needed to get over this on his own.

Only, he was starting to think this wasn't something you just 'got over'.

"A little more detail please?" Weiss clipped, but the feline could still hear the rapid beat of her heart, and the way her voice rose just a _little _too high when she spoke, betraying her concern.

"I left yesterday because - I couldn't be in that uniform, I couldn't - I needed to go buy something." He shakily stood up, wandered over to his wardrobe and tugged out the binder and the wig he'd tucked away, hoping he'd never actually need them, knowing now that yeah, he definitely did.

Weiss just gave him a blank stare. "Um…what?"

God she was gonna make him explain it he didn't know if he was ready for that-

And then his saving grace, recognition clicked and Weiss stood up, crossing her arms. A long, uncomfortable silence settled between them as the heiress chose her words.

"Blake, when I said I didn't care about you being in the White Fang, you _do _realize what I meant, right?"

Not the direction he'd expected _at all_, his brow creasing. "Um…I don't…"

"Because when I said that I don't care about you being an ex-terrorist, it was because I know that that isn't who you are anymore. It doesn't mean I don't care about _why_, and it doesn't mean I don't care about _you_. It meant I care about who you're _trying _to be, who you are now. And - I know I'm not the…_easiest_ person to talk to…but, this is - this is important."

She huffed, glanced away before her face got too red. That was twice now she'd thought she'd lost Blake, and she just had no idea how to cope with it except to lash out. Part of her hoped Blake could see through the ruse - but part of her hoped she - _he, gotta remember that _- couldn't.

"You're - you're _okay _with this?"

"I mean…it'll take some…getting _used _to," Weiss admitted, "but…I just want you to…I want you to stay, Blake. I told you, I thought about it for twelve hours, and I simply refuse to lose you." She stopped herself from blurting out anything further, her cheeks burning at the abrupt confession.

Blake actually - he smiled, much to the heiress's surprise. "It'll take a little getting used to for the both of us, I think," he smirked, his confidence returning piece by piece.

"I'm gonna put this on…if…?"

"Oh - yeah, I'll just -"

She turned around, stammering and stumbling through what might've been an apology, except she really wasn't sure what she'd been saying cuz Blake had started unbuttoning his shirt and he was -

"How do I look?"

_Handsome_.

Weiss's eyebrows shot up wide with surprise when she turned around again, and yes her teammate was cute and blushing and nervous, and Weiss's heart flooded with affection she hadn't even known she was _capable _of.

"You uh - you look really good, Blake," she admitted shyly, hand grasping at her opposite arm.

"You really think so?"

Weiss smiled, nodded more confidently. "Yeah, just - come here for a moment." The feline obliged, bending his head as Weiss's fingers sifted through the hair of the dark wig, readjusting it here and there to look its best.

"Perfect," Weiss grinned, retreating slightly to admire her work.

"Well - not quite."

She darted forward, chancing an abrupt kiss to the feline's mouth, her cheeks stained bright red as she pulled back.

There was a moment of silence where Weiss thought her heart would just tear right through her chest, and then-

"Perfect," Blake repeated, pulling the heiress close.


End file.
